Communicating Love

This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus.

—1 John 4:17

Aaron had a college professor who said over and over, “It doesn’t matter how much you love your kids. What matters is communicating that love in a way that they can understand and feel that love.”

The same is true for friendships and marriages and all relationships.

It’s so easy for me to feel warm, loving thoughts about friends or family members . . . and then go on about my day, never reaching out. I think about them all the time, pray for them, and watch the details of their lives spool out over Facebook—first day of school photos, last moments of summer photos. I feel connected and warm, full of affection for these lovely people.

But how on earth would they know that?

Recently I’ve made a point to send more texts and e-mails, a couple old-fashioned letters. I’ve scheduled a walk and a coffee and a dinner. I’ve looked people in the eye and said, “I love you. I’m thankful for you.”

Because at the end of the day, Aaron’s professor is exactly right: It doesn’t matter how much you love someone. What matters is that they know it.