In The Darkness

IN THE DARKNESS

a prayer to open

Here’s my heart, Lord. Speak what is true.

Here’s my life, Lord. Speak what is true.

O LORD, God of my salvation,

I cry out to you by day.

I come to you at night.

Now hear my prayer;

listen to my cry.

For my life is full of troubles,

and death draws near.

I am as good as dead,

like a strong man with no strength left.

They have left me among the dead,

and I lie like a corpse in a grave.

I am forgotten,

cut off from your care.

You have thrown me into the lowest pit,

into the darkest depths.

Your anger weighs me down;

with wave after wave you have engulfed me.

You have driven my friends away

by making me repulsive to them.

I am in a trap with no way of escape.

My eyes are blinded by my tears.

Each day I beg for your help, O LORD;

I lift my hands to you for mercy.

Are your wonderful deeds of any use to the dead?

Do the dead rise up and praise you?

Can those in the grave declare your unfailing love?

Can they proclaim your faithfulness in the place of destruction?

Can the darkness speak of your wonderful deeds?

Can anyone in the land of forgetfulness talk about your righteousness?

O LORD, I cry out to you.

I will keep on pleading day by day.

O LORD, why do you reject me?

Why do you turn your face from me?

I have been sick and close to death since my youth.

I stand helpless and desperate before your terrors.

Your fierce anger has overwhelmed me.

Your terrors have paralyzed me.

They swirl around me like floodwaters all day long.

They have engulfed me completely.

You have taken away my companions and loved ones.

Darkness is my closest friend.

In this psalm, the author asks a question nearly all of us have asked at one point or another: Is God present in the darkness? When we have our lowest lows, when we are suffering or dying—or someone we love is dying—is God there? Does he see our pain? Does he know our despair? And if the answer is yes, why are we so often unable to sense his presence? In Old Testament days—before Jesus—God’s people did not have the assurance of life after death with God. Darkness seemed to prevail. Indeed sometimes even today we feel and live this way, forgetting that in Christ and through Christ, death is not the end. Just as he resurrected from the dead, so too will we (John 11:25-26). Although this truth may not always find its way into our hearts and minds as we experience darkness, it is our lifeline. If today’s psalm were our lament, we might end it this way: “I hold on to the hope I have in Jesus Christ. I will be raised to life. Death and darkness will not prevail.” How might our lives be shaped if, in the midst of despair and darkness, our lament was always paired with the hope we have in Christ?

• Read this passage again slowly. What word or phrase stands out to you? Why do you think that word or phrase speaks to you? What does it say?
• What pointed questions do you want to pose to God about your own suffering, the suffering of friends or family members, or the suffering in the world? Remembering that you are in his loving presence, ask God the questions you are longing to voice. Listen for how he responds.
• Reflect on seasons of darkness you have walked through. How did you hold on to hope? Or if you were unable to, how did you make it through those times? If you’re in a season of darkness now, who could you invite into your life to be hopeful on your behalf?

Lord, thank you for light, life, and resurrection through Jesus! How my heart would despair if I couldn’t hold on to the hope I have in him. In those moments or seasons when darkness falls upon me, help me remember the life that awaits me in your presence forever. Do not let me forget the hope I have, and surround me with friends who can remind me that death does not prevail. And may I bring hope to those who suffer and be a light to those who despair. When I suffer, grant me mercy and allow me to know the gift and joy of your presence. Amen.