Strength

Strength

When I am weak, then I am strong.

“I JUST DON’T THINK I can do it anymore,” I whispered to my husband Kyle over our kitchen sink as my hands scrubbed supper dishes left too long in a dirty sink.

We’d been foster parents for our local county for almost six years. Most of the time I enjoyed what we did, and although there were moments of hard, overall I felt a sense of accomplishment from helping kids through traumatic circumstances.

But this fall felt different. I was tired. Too often at the end of what I knew I could handle. I knew I was at a breaking point when we’d agreed to take another sibling group into our home and that night I tossed and turned, unable to sleep, as tears slipped down my cheeks.

The next morning, my husband looked at me, concern in his eyes and said, “I’m calling the social worker. We can’t do this right now.” I nodded in agreement. Too ashamed to give words to the moment, engulfed with the feelings of shame that I’d somehow failed.

The next week, after many discussions, we made the painful decision to stop being foster parents for our county. And although I knew I needed to stop, I still felt a bit like a failure. Like I quit because I just couldn’t quite handle it. And the lie that I was weak whispered across my soul.

But as life continued to go by, and the days turned to months and now years, my view of that experience has shifted over time. My ability to accept that I am human and have limits is freeing me from a once perfectionistic, I-can-do-anything-without-little-help attitude.

I am finally coming to fully understand and embrace the idea that I don’t need to be superhuman, and neither do you. We don’t have to be ashamed of our perceived weaknesses, because God is there to fill in every gaping hole for us. And because of it, we have the freedom to readily acknowledge our own weaknesses and limitations, realizing it’s often in the middle of them that we find our strength in our Savior.

Lord, thank you that when we feel weak, you are our strength. Amen.

-Kendra

One Good Step: Think of one area of your life you have felt weak in. How has God shown you his strength through your weakness?