Rapport

Rapport

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

A YOUNGER FAMILY MEMBER had been having a hard time. She was at the age of wanting to be free from the rules of her parents’ house, so she chose to move out of their house to make her own decisions. At the same time, she found herself with a group of friends that weren’t very healthy and had started making choices that weren’t in her (or their) best interest.

My husband and I were not that close to her. We had not been a part of her life in any significant way for the past several years, only interacting with her on holidays and large family gatherings. We wondered what we could do. How could we help or encourage her?

Frustrated, my husband finally stated, “If you want to speak into someone’s life, you must have some rapport with them. You have to have a relationship to be able to have permission to speak truth to them.” And I agreed, although there are always exceptions to this rule, it is most often true. I value wisdom most from the people who I know, who I trust, and who love me well. We began to work at having a relationship and building rapport with our family member so we could be there to support her as she needed it.

No one wants to be someone’s project. We all want genuine relationships with those who truly care for us and our well-being. Building rapport happens over time and as we walk in close proximity with others. And it can only happen when we are willing to, not just say that we love one another, but show it by our actions and the way that we are available to support them. In good times and hard. Rapport takes time and effort, but when we’ve done it, we’ll have the permission to speak into another’s life when they may really need it.

Lord, thank you for the love you model and give to us. Help us to do the hard work of building rapport with those around us so that we can love others well. Amen.

-Kendra

One Good Step: Think of someone that you would like to build rapport with and reach out to them in a note, text, or phone call.