Empathy

“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.” (Isaiah 43:1-2, NIV)

“And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” (Matthew 28:20, NIV)

“Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” (Matthew 10:29-31, NIV)

You might be surprised that empathy, which invites us to walk in other people’s shoes, is an antidote for fear. But understanding and connecting with others can dissolve our fear—of others and of our situation. It’s the same principle I use to connect with each guide dog.

Several years ago, I took a job in New York City. I lived in New Jersey, so my guide dog Linnie and I commuted, taking two trains into and out of Manhattan each day. Usually, we managed this without incident. But one evening, things didn’t go exactly according to plan.

We’d taken the PATH train to Penn Station Newark and just managed to catch the Northeast Corridor line train, our train home. The train made several stops before I noticed I’d been on the train longer than usual. Part of the problem was that the public address system wasn’t working so the engineer’s station announcements never got to me and I clearly miscounted stops. Panic started to rise in me. I took a deep breath. Okay, connect with people around you, I told myself.

“Excuse me,” I said to the woman sitting next to me. “What stop is coming up?”

“Well, the last stop was Elizabeth, so the next one will be Linden,” she said.

Uh oh.

“Well, Linnie, looks like we might have a longer commute tonight,” I said. At Linden, we disembarked. Since neither Linnie nor I can read signs, we asked a couple of other commuters how to get to the opposite side of the tracks, so we could catch a train back to Elizabeth.

I stood on the platform waiting, feeling a bit foolish—and a bit nervous. I know my way out of the station when I’m on the other platform, but now I’ll be coming out a different way. I can’t believe they didn’t announce the stations! And I can’t believe I wasn’t counting the stops!

Linnie nosed my hand, sensing my concern. Connections can allay our fears. That day, and many other days, people had been quite willing to direct me or offer help if I asked. Occasionally, I encountered rude people. But when I was polite, people typically responded in kind. Linnie’s nosing me reminded me that I shouldn’t show her stress or fear. I petted her and said, “Don’t worry, Linnie. Everything is fine.” And it was.

Finally, the right train pulled into the station. We got on, rode back to Elizabeth, and got out. Thankfully, other commuters streamed toward the exit, and we went along with the crowd. When I got outside the station, I asked directions once, then found myself on a familiar street and was soon at our apartment.

When we are afraid, we sometimes isolate ourselves. The problem with that, of course, is isolation causes us to feel more afraid and alone. But when we connect with others, we know we’re not alone and that makes us braver.

God promises to never leave us or forsake us. And sometimes, he speaks to us through other people, or our canine companions.

Prayer:

God, when I feel afraid, remind me to practice empathy and compassion for both myself, and for others. May your perfect love drive out my fear.