No Place To Go

I’VE ALWAYS BEEN very driven. Inevitably, every personality test reveals another layer of ambition, drive, a quest for perfection, and attention to detail. This means that I have been able to do a lot of things I set out to do, but it also means I’ve done it all at a hurried pace. On top of that, it can create a sense of guilt because I know how my personality must exhaust my loved ones (it exhausts me, too!). So many days I have my eyes on the prize, and rarely is it what’s right in front of me. The wheels seem to be constantly moving.

I’ve been on the other end of this too, and in that case there were literal wheels in motion.

I saw an acquaintance in the grocery store and stopped to say hi. I could tell she was in a hurry, and as she kept rolling her cart forward, I felt such pressure to wrap up what I was saying. I felt like an inconvenience.

Is this how my kids feel? Do I rush their souls because they know they have to keep up with my pace if they want my attention? God seems to be hitting this message home in everything I’m reading lately.

First there were Elisabeth Elliot’s words: “Often we neglect the thing assigned for the moment because we are preoccupied with something that is not our business just now. How easy it is to give only half our attention to someone who needs us . . . because the other half is focused on a future worry.”^a

Then I came across John Ortberg’s book Soul Keeping, in which he paints a picture of his mentor, Dallas Willard. His description made this hurried soul slow down: “His face and the movements of his body all seemed to say that he had no place else to go and nothing in particular to worry about.”^b This sounds very simple, but I was mesmerized by the image. There is something comforting about sitting in the presence of someone who has no worries and no place to be.

I want to be a person who puts others at ease because they know that when they are with me, I am all there. I’m not checking my phone repeatedly or watching the clock. I’m not waiting for my turn to talk or to share what I think is brilliant advice.

Instead, I’m able to sit and listen and be present.

I happened to take another personality test recently, and this one highlighted two strengths but also my biggest weakness. It said, “You are not always flexible and can lose sight of others’ needs in the pursuit of your goals.”

Just in case I hadn’t taken Elisabeth’s or John’s wisdom to heart, this test pegged me to a T. In pursuit of my goals, I tend to lose sight of the needs of everyone around me. I want things that are measurable, and my to-do list is the chief of that. Shepherding my kids’ hearts, hearing what my husband is saying between the lines, being there for a friend who’s too afraid to ask for help—those things can’t be quantified as easily.

If we just can’t help but measure things, let’s at least change our measuring stick. Hebrews 6:10 says, “God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them” (NIV). There may be no immediate item to cross off the list. You may not receive a pat on the back when you listen intently to your littlest one tell the longest story known to humankind or you give your middle schooler yet another ride to practice. But in those moments, can we remember Hebrews 6:10? God sees you. God sees the impact you’re making. You are loving on his kids each time you choose them over your to-do list. Slow down. Your biggest impact isn’t saved for the future. It is right here, right now, with whatever is right before you. Don’t let this moment pass you by in hopes of having a greater impact down the road.

ACTION STEP

Meditate on Proverbs 4:25, and keep your eyes straight ahead today.

PRAYER

Father, I need your vision. I am constantly looking to the left and right, behind me, and a thousand steps ahead of me. Show me how to stop calculating and to keep my eyes on what’s right in front of me today. Show me how to love those around me with a countenance that says they matter to me and that I have no place else to be. In Jesus’ name, amen.

MORNING QUESTIONS

TAKEAWAY TODAY | Do you know someone who makes you feel like you are their only priority when you’re talking to them?

What would it look like to be fully present in your relationships today?

DREADING TODAY | Is there anything you’re dreading today?

REDEFINING TODAY | If so, what is another way you can view that thing you’re dreading?

ASKING GOD TODAY | What request are you bringing before the Lord today?

EVENING QUESTIONS

REFLECTION | Were there any times throughout the day when you prioritized a person over your to-do list?

LITTLE VICTORIES | Where did you see God show up even in small ways, reminding you that you aren’t alone?

WHITE FLAG MOMENTS | When did you want to hide or escape today?

MEMORY OF THE DAY | What do you want to relish and thank God for?