Chasing Love

Chasing Love

Lysa TerKeurst

Tears streamed down her beautiful face as we talked. Just six months ago, her world had been filled with love—a devoted husband, a healthy toddler, fun friends. Life was full.

But some part of her heart still felt a little empty. She couldn’t put her finger on it. She tried talking to friends, but they laughed it off as hormones that would pass. Only the feeling didn’t pass. She felt detached from her husband and disappointed that his love didn’t fulfill her. She’d always thought of marriage as the ultimate love. He was going to be the one to right her wrongs and fill her insecurities, or so she thought.

Questions bombarded her. What’s wrong with him? Why doesn’t he say what he’s supposed to say? Maybe it’s me. Maybe I’m not pretty enough, witty enough, good enough.

Then she met a man who said things she’d longed to hear her husband say. He made her feel pretty and witty. She rationalized that she’d never really loved her husband and that this new man was her true soul mate. She fell into his arms and spun a web of lies. The thrill of new romance clouded every decision.

She had not wanted to come to the women’s retreat. She knew it might make her feel guilty and she was well beyond guilty feelings. She was just waiting for the right time to leave her husband and start over with the real love of her life. But her friends had started to grow suspicious about her reluctance to attend. To appease them, she went.

Over the course of the retreat, the walls she’d carefully constructed to keep everyone at a distance crumbled. She confessed it all. When she approached me after one of the sessions, she desperately wanted to know how I felt so full of God’s love. She’d never known that kind of relationship with God. She was now convinced it wasn’t the love of another man her heart craved; it was the love of God.

This is true for many people. We spend years chasing things we think will make us feel loved. But everything this world offers is temporary. The kind of love our souls crave is eternal. And only God can fill us with that kind of love.

Chasing love outside the will of God invites the exact opposite of love. Here is a picture of God’s perfect love: It is patient, kind … doesn’t envy … it’s not self-seeking … does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth … it always protects … always perseveres. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4–8).

This isn’t a description of what is ours when we fall in love with another person. It is a description of God’s love. The kind of love our souls crave will never be found in the things of this world. Lasting and perfectly satisfying love will only be found when we stop chasing other people and things and start living out the truths of God.

Dear Lord, please help me see marriage for the sacred gift that it is. And help me to be ultimately satisfied in Your love. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

REMEMBER

The kind of love your soul craves is eternal. And only God can fill you with that kind of love.

REFLECT

How does it make you feel to consider allowing God to fill your deepest needs? What would change if you gave Him room to love you?

RESPOND

Make plans to take a weekend retreat to reconnect with the Lord. Check with your church to see if they have one coming up, or arrange to do one with a few close girlfriends.

POWER VERSES

Ephesians 1:4; Matthew 19:26