Self-image: Gaining A Good Self-image

So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view.

2 Corinthians 5:16

Recently I realized how fortunate I am to have a positive self-image. My parents affirmed me with those words that build up. “You are intelligent.” “You are handsome.” “You are special.” As a result, I have always walked into a room of strangers confident that I would gain their approval and manage the social interaction successfully.

A friend of mine had a different experience. His father heaped a heavy burden upon him which he still groans and labors to get out from under, even after fifteen years as a Christian. “You are ugly.” “You are stupid.” “You will never amount to anything.”

Self-Image Problems

No problem facing people is more pervasive than the problem of maintaining (or gaining) a good self-image. More and more kids are growing up thinking less and less of themselves. This problem has accelerated as our lifestyles have accelerated; there is less time to build each other up.

What self-image has a fallen world left on your doorstep? Are you fortunate to think well of yourself? Or, like many, are you filled with fears and doubts about yourself and bitterness toward those who made you feel that way? To have victory we must get to the place where “from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view.” This includes ourselves, as well as those who drag us down.

The problem of low self-esteem is sin. Not only have we been sinned against; we have heaped a heavy load on others, too. Frankly, dragging others down with us is one major way we deal with our own inferiority feelings. If we sink, at least someone else sinks, too.

Solutions

Our self-initiated efforts to overcome a poor self-image leave us discouraged because they do not work. Only Jesus can heal us; only His love compels us. He removes the sting from the barbs of other people, and He forgives the sins we have in weakness done to others.

In Him we become a new creation. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” (2 Corinthians 5:17). Every person who comes to the foot of the cross is reborn into a new family. We gain a new Father, a perfect, eternal parent. When by God’s grace we are regenerated, we receive a new self-image. He replaces self-hate with self-love. He replaces self-doubt with self-esteem. He replaces bitterness and hatred with compassion and pity.

The Next Few Steps

Are you still struggling with a poor self-image? Have you accepted that you are a new creation? Do you believe it? Thank Him that He has given you a new nature, that you are a new creation. Pray for God’s grace and mercy to deliver you from bondage to low self-esteem. Give up the worldly point of view and engage in the ministry of reconciliation, even to those who have hurt you. This will release you from the shackles of a poor self-image.

Forgive those who have trespassed against you. If you cannot forgive them from afar, go to them in person. Explain your hurt, your pain. Express your forgiveness. Ask them to forgive you for the bitter thoughts you have held against them. Ask to be reconciled. Could the outcome be any worse than the present pain?

If you are estranged from loved ones, let them know you are a new creation. Prove it by humbling yourself unto reconciliation. Reveal to them your life hid with Christ. Help them see the gospel in you.

If, perchance, approval is still withheld, let Christ bear your burden. Abandon your bitterness against the one who withholds his approval. When we allow Christ to be our burden-bearer, we become a new creation, the righteousness of God. The direction of our self-esteem will change. Our self-esteem will continue to grow until the day of our glorification with God.

I SURRENDER

God, I have become a new creation, but the old has not gone. My self-image is not as good as it should be. I still regard those who have trespassed against me from a worldly point of view. Grant me the same regard for them as Christ commands. As I have been reconciled to Christ, reconcile my relationships. Release me from the bondage of withheld approval. Allow the righteousness that is in Him to be in me also. Amen.