A Firm And Dependable Foundation Of Committed Care

devotion - A Firm and Dependable Foundation of Committed Care

Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love. Romans 12:10

Devotion means that you can be counted on to show loving concern for your spouse. It means bringing a secure foundation to your marriage because your spouse knows that you are committed to loving him or her. Devotion means that even in the midst of marital struggles or disagreements, you are committed to telling your spouse that you care. It means that even in the midst of tough times, you share your commitment to the relationship and to the Lord.

In my (David’s) own life, devotion means declaring my allegiance to our marriage. It means showing that I am zealously committed to loving my spouse. Devotion means proclaiming to my spouse my strong attachment and affection. It means expressing my earnest desire to love my spouse even in the hard times. It means “I’ll keep loving you, even when things get difficult.” Devotion means showing God’s perfect love, a love that casts out fear (1 John 4:18).

We often see couples who have enjoyed some great times together but who have experienced rejection or disappointment. And once a spouse feels rejected or let down, she retreats. Once a spouse feels betrayed or abandoned in some way, he withdraws his love.

We’ve discovered that this kind of pattern often occurs in marriage because the present hurt in the relationship taps into a reservoir of unresolved hurt—from childhood or from former relationships. When this reminder of the past pain comes, one or both marriage partners may withdraw into a cover of self-protection, and when that happens, lines of communication are severed.

Counseling or mentoring with another couple can address this reservoir of unhealed pain. It’s scary to look at painful issues from the past, but progress depends on daily caring devotion within the marriage.

In what ways can you openly show your devotion and allegiance to your spouse today?