Once Upon A Time

Once upon a Time

I stood up and moved to the podium to face a room full of precious women gathered on retreat. I’d planned to talk about the Kingdom of God, and I was prepared and ready. But when I saw their faces, for a moment I was struck dumb. Not with fear. With a heart full of memories and images flickering across my mind’s eye. It was as if God whispered, “Once upon a time” and then clicked the projector on.

I saw the church where I walked the aisle at eight to give my heart to Jesus. A hillside in New Mexico where I wept at nineteen and knew that yes would be forever. A tiny church in Brazil wet with rain and ringing with praise. Dozens of retreats, living room Bible studies, Young Life clubs, and Sunday school classrooms. I saw the faces of friends, teachers, mentors, and loved ones. I saw my own face as a little girl, a fresh-faced teenager, a grown-up woman in love, and an older, if not wiser, version of her, arms empty but heart full.

Then I did something I hadn’t planned on. I told the women waiting to hear about the Kingdom what I’d just seen. And of how good God has been to me. Then I swallowed and blinked back the tears, opened my Bible, and followed him again to someplace new.

A week later I was back in the church I’d attended as a child, this time for a wedding. The sanctuary was redecorated, but the space was still the same. The aisle the bride walked on her father’s arm, I walked once upon a time in white anklets and black patent shoes beside my own dad. The bride took her groom’s hand at the altar; I took the pastor’s at the same spot, and he smiled down at me.

I told someone once, “We have history, God and I.” And we do. Once upon a time our love was shiny and new. But it’s sweeter to me now than it was at the beginning. “Grow old along with me. The best is yet to be. . . .” That’s my story. I believed it yesterday, and today I couldn’t be more certain that it is true.

The LORD is my chosen portion and my cup.

Psalm 16:5, ESV