Kindled

Kindled

I never imagined I would read a book without turning its pages. Since I bought my first Whitman’s children’s classic at a five-and-dime store in Corpus Christi, Texas, I’ve been one hopeless, book-loving word nerd. I “heart” the feel of new covers, the smell of freshly printed pages, and the soft pop of a just-creased spine. I like writing in margins, underlining lovely phrases, and folding back pages I mean to visit again.

But then I received an e-book reader. I’ve learned that while nothing will replace the old, familiar way of reading for me, I enjoy the benefits of carrying around an ever-ready shelf of books in one slim case. Who cares if the National Geographic in the doctor’s office is two years old, or the paper stand at the corner coffee shop is empty by seven in the morning? I have plenty of titles to choose from right here in my shoulder bag. In short, I’ve been “Kindled”: reintroduced to a very old love in a brand-new way.

I have another love who has been surprising me in new ways for years. We met when I was eight, and I fell hard. He was (and still is) the best thing that ever happened to me. He fit my third-grade heart like a glove, and he’s fit every day since just as perfectly. He found me first, loved me, and invited me in. We have years of history, yet he still surprises me with his kindness.

Lately he’s been teaching me that weakness isn’t repugnant, but pride is. That vulnerability isn’t nearly as dangerous as I used to think. That I’m not as strong as I once believed and more comfortable with that fact than I ever imagined I might be. That the hard things I can’t change might just be the very best tools at his disposal for shaping me into the image of his Son. And that even when I’m weary or angry or frightened or more than a little lost, he keeps right on tending the fire he first kindled in me such a long time ago. It never burns in quite the same way twice . . . and I am learning to love him for that, too.

I will refine them like silver and purify them like gold.

Zechariah 13:9