Iggie And Me

Iggie and Me

For months I’ve been meeting a sixteenth-century Spanish monk every day for a half hour of morning prayer. We were introduced by a trusted spiritual friend and director who offered—twice—to connect us. At first I declined, because I couldn’t imagine cramming another thing into my day. But months later, I said yes, because I had good reason to believe that this odd fix up was God’s invitation.

Technically, I am making the 19th Annotation of the Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius of Loyola. Through systematic, daily times of prayer and reflection on selected Scriptures, I am seeking a greater awareness of the presence of Christ in my everyday life.

If you were to peek at my calendar, you would see the notation “Iggie”, morning, noon, and night (an extended morning prayer, plus a brief check-in called Examen at midday and in the evening). Iggie seemed like a cryptic shorthand for something hard to explain and even a little awkward to confess: “Yes. I’m meeting regularly with a monk. Who founded the Jesuits. And no, I haven’t become Catholic.” A brief litany of beeps on my phone reminds me that it’s Iggie time: time to center my thoughts on the God I love, to listen, and to love him back.

Sometimes I read the Word and cry. Sometimes I confess. Sometimes I praise. Question. Plead. Give thanks. But it’s not really Iggie I’m with—although his words are a wise and winsome guide. I’m with Jesus. And he’s with me. What I discover about myself in the sometimes too-bright light of Word and Spirit isn’t always a comfort. But he is. Every time.

I’ve no need to be afraid of meeting Jesus—even when he illuminates my sin. Because he loves his own and I am his. My dog-eared guidebook invites me to respond to what I read and experience in prayer with little conversations between God and me called colloquies. Some days I journal my thoughts, baring my soul and then praying that no one sees my words but him. I’m feeling less and less afraid of what Perfect Love will do with me when next we meet. He’s so, so good that way.

Listen to the LORD who created you. O Israel, the one who formed you says, “Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine.”

Isaiah 43:1