Friendships In Heaven: Old And New

Friendships in Heaven: Old and New

I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings.

— Luke 16:9

We have not lost our dear ones who have departed from this life, but have merely sent them ahead of us, so we also shall depart and shall come to that life where they will be more than ever dear as they will be better known to us, and where we shall love them without fear of parting.^a

— AUGUSTINE

Do you have a close friend who has had a profound influence on you? Do you think it’s a coincidence that she was in your dorm wing or became your roommate? Was it accidental that your desk or mailbox was near his, or that her family lived next door, or that your father was transferred when you were in third grade so that you ended up in his neighborhood? God orchestrates our lives. “From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live” (Acts 17:26).

It’s no accident which neighborhood you grew up in, who lived next door, who went to school with you, who is part of your church, and who works with you. Our relationships were appointed by God, so there’s every reason to believe they’ll continue in Heaven. God’s plan doesn’t stop on the New Earth—it continues. God doesn’t abandon his purposes; he extends and fulfills them. God-ordained friendships begun on Earth will continue in Heaven, becoming richer than ever.

When God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18), he was speaking not only of marriage but also of the general need for human companionship. He was saying, “I’ll make these people so that they’ll need one another.” God delights in his children’s love for one another.

Nothing can ever replace the shared experience of loving relationships in the battles and heartaches of life. We are forging a lasting camaraderie like that of soldiers on the battlefield. And when we get to Heaven, we’re not likely to forget our common experience of fighting spiritual battles side by side, guarding one another’s backs in the trenches of this fallen Earth.

I think of my close friend Steve Keels. We have walked side by side for many years, laughed and cried and prayed together, and been there for each other in times of joy and heartache. Surely such relationships won’t diminish in Heaven but will be enhanced.

I envision sitting around a campfire in Heaven, trading stories of the truly exciting times we had on Earth. Times when we turned to our Commander and trusted him to guide and sustain us on long marches. Times when we leaned on our comrades for strength, when we tended to one another and carried and guided one another across the minefields. Times when we basked in the company of family and friends, “fellow citizens with God’s people and members of God’s household” (Ephesians 2:19).

After speaking of a shrewd servant’s desire to use earthly resources so that “people will welcome me into their houses” (Luke 16:4), Jesus told his followers to “use worldly wealth [earthly resources] to gain friends [by making a difference in their lives on Earth].” The reason? “So that when it is gone [when life on Earth is over], you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings” (v. 9).

These friends appear to be those whose lives we’ve touched on Earth and who now have their own “eternal dwellings.” Luke 16:9 seems to say that these “eternal dwellings” are places where we’ll stay and fellowship with friends, perhaps as we move about the heavenly Kingdom. Some of these friends may be new ones, but surely many will be people we already know, into whose lives we’ve already invested.

Do I believe that Jesus is suggesting we’ll actually share lodging, meals, and fellowship with friends in God’s Kingdom? Yes. I’m aware that some people think this idea is far-fetched. But why? Because when we think of Heaven, we don’t usually think of resurrected people living on a resurrected Earth, living in dwelling places and eating and sharing together. But that’s exactly what Scripture teaches us.

Will some friendships be closer than others? Jesus was closer to John than to any of the other disciples. Jesus was closer to Peter, James, and John than to the rest of the Twelve, and closer to the Twelve than to the seventy, and closer to the seventy than to his other followers. He was close to Lazarus and Mary and Martha. He was so close to his mother that while he was dying on the cross, he instructed John to care for her after his death. If Christ was closer to some people than to others, clearly there can’t be anything wrong with that.

In Heaven, there won’t be cliques, exclusion, arrogance, posturing, belittling, or jealousy. When friends particularly enjoy each other’s company, that’s as God designed it. If, as you walk about the New Jerusalem, you see Adam and Eve holding hands as they look at the tree of life, would you begrudge them their special friendship?

Perhaps you’re disappointed that you’ve never had the friendships you long for. In Heaven, you’ll have much closer relationships with people you already know, but it’s also possible that you haven’t yet met the closest friends you’ll ever have. Perhaps it will be someone seated next to you at the first great feast. After all, the God who orchestrates friendships will be in charge of the seating arrangements.

On the New Earth, we’ll experience the joy of familiarity in old relationships and the joy of discovery in new ones. As we get to know one another better, we’ll get to know God better. As we find joy in each other, we’ll find joy in him. No human relationships will overshadow our relationship with God. All will serve to enhance it.

In his song “Thank You,” Ray Boltz pictures us in Heaven, meeting people who explain how our giving touched their lives. Every time we give to missions and feed the hungry, we should think about people we’ll meet in Heaven. Who knows, some of those very people we’re helping and praying for today may one day become our closest friends.

What do you think about the idea of meeting new people and developing new friendships in Heaven? Does the idea excite you?

Father, how great to think about friends, both old and new, in Heaven. Thank you that you enjoyed special friendships on Earth. But thank you, too, that your friendships were inclusive. Help us, Lord, to enjoy the friends we have and to look forward to the friendships that await us in your Kingdom, where we will have time and opportunity to rekindle many friendships we’ve been unable to pursue, maintain those we currently have, and develop new ones. Thank you that you’ve created us to need other people. Thank you that you meet many of our needs through the friendships you’ve given us. Help us to anticipate the day when friendships will rise to their highest levels, nourished in your presence.