Build Each Other Up

Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.

“She’s not always nice to me,” Isla told her dad one evening after dinner. “Sometimes she even teases me in front of others, and it kind of hurts my feelings.”

Isla’s dad nodded in understanding. “Do you know why George and I are such good friends?” he asked her.

Isla shook her head no.

“Because he doesn’t tease me about being bald, and I don’t tease him about being short. That’s what good friends do. They build each other up; they don’t tear one another down.”

Her dad went on to explain that he and George had a shared understanding that they would never make fun of one another, and they would always be respectful of one another.

“Sometimes even adults use humor in a way that puts someone else down instead of building them up. I’ve decided I don’t want to be that kind of friend,” he said. “You know, maybe you want to talk to this friend about her comments. Maybe she doesn’t realize what she’s doing and that it’s hurting your feelings. Maybe then she’ll stop.”

Isla agreed to take her dad’s advice and try talking to her friend.

Friendship is something we all have to work on. When we create healthy habits early in life, they stay with us as we grow. Looking for friends who build you up rather than put you or others down—and being that kind of friend to others—is a valuable quality in friendship.

The Bible gives us the same advice Isla’s dad did when it says that rather than abusing our friends or mocking them, we should speak good and helpful words that encourage others. That is the very definition of what makes a good friend. Let’s work to build one another up, not tear each other down.

Things to Think About

• Have you had an experience with a friend who teased you? What happened?
• Do you have a good friend who encourages you? How have they built you up?

DAILY ACT OF FRIENDSHIP

Be specific when you encourage a friend today. Say things like, “You did a great job at . . .” or “I really appreciate that you . . .”