How can I restore a broken relationship? - Relationships - TouchPoints

Matthew 5:21-24“You have heard that our ancestors were told, ‘You must not murder. If you commit murder, you are subject to judgment.’ But I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell. “So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the Temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God.”

Reconciliation with others is a priority to God and should also be a priority for us. The first step in restoring a broken relationship is to honestly evaluate the cause or problem in the relationship. Once we identify the problem, we need to take steps to reconcile with the person, even if the tension or fissure in the relationship is not our fault.

Luke 15:18“‘I will go home to my father and say, “Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you.”’”

If we have caused hurt or division in a relationship, we need to confess what we have done to God and to whomever we have wronged. Often both sides in a broken relationship are guilty to some degree and both sides need to confess some wrongdoing. But even if the other person refuses to admit fault, we should not allow our pride to keep us from confessing ours.

Matthew 18:15“If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back.”

We may need to confront someone individually and privately in order to restore a relationship. We must be sure to do it with grace and love.

Proverbs 19:11Sensible people control their temper; they earn respect by overlooking wrongs.

Ephesians 4:25-27, 31-32So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body. And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil. . . . Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

We need to deal with our anger before we can truly forgive another person and restore a broken relationship.

Genesis 50:18-21Then his brothers came and threw themselves down before Joseph. “Look, we are your slaves!” they said. But Joseph replied, “Don’t be afraid of me. Am I God, that I can punish you? You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people. No, don’t be afraid. I will continue to take care of you and your children.” So he reassured them by speaking kindly to them.

Through forgiveness, grudges are released and revenge is forgotten.

Colossians 3:13Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.

Imitating God’s model of forgiveness is the key to restoring our relationships.