How can God use my grief for good?

Psalm 51:17The sacrifice you [God] desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God.

Joel 2:13“Don’t tear your clothing in your grief, but tear your hearts instead.” Return to the Lord your God, for he is merciful and compassionate, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. He is eager to relent and not punish.

2 Corinthians 7:9-10Now I [Paul] am glad I sent it [a harsh letter], not because it hurt you, but because the pain caused you to repent and change your ways. It was the kind of sorrow God wants his people to have, so you were not harmed by us in any way. For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death.

James 4:9-10Let there be tears for what you have done. Let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor.

Sometimes, we feel grief over a sin we have committed. It is wise to grieve and repent, but we should never despair. Grief is not the end. It is the path to a new beginning. Healthy grief can lead to confession, repentance, and a restored relationship with God. Some of Scripture’s greatest heroes—such as Moses, David, and Peter—committed heavy sins. Moses performed a miracle with pride and anger and was barred from entering the Promised Land. David committed adultery and murder, which led to deep consequences for his family. Peter denied and abandoned Jesus during his Lord’s darkest hour, and that regret doubtless followed him the rest of his life. Yet each of these heroes repented wholeheartedly, and God not only embraced their repentance—he used their lives in powerful ways. And God longs to do the same for us.

John 9:1-3As Jesus was walking along, he saw a man who had been blind from birth. “Rabbi,” his disciples asked him, “why was this man born blind? Was it because of his own sins or his parents’ sins?” “It was not because of his sins or his parents’ sins,” Jesus answered. “This happened so the power of God could be seen in him.”

The reasons we must suffer grief are not always easy to understand. The disciples assumed sin was the cause for a man’s blindness, but Jesus knew something else was at play. In the end, God used this man’s greatest grief—his lack of sight—to prepare him for a life of joy and purpose.

Deuteronomy 33:27“The eternal God is your refuge, and his everlasting arms are under you.”

Psalm 23:1-4The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name. Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.

Lamentations 3:18-25I cry out, “My splendor is gone! Everything I had hoped for from the Lord is lost!” The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!” The Lord is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him.

Grief is a long and difficult journey that often passes through the darkest of valleys. But it is when the path is the most treacherous that the Good Shepherd has the greatest opportunity to show his faithfulness. When you turn to God in your grief and let his arms hold you up in your darkest times, your faith will find a depth you never knew before.

2 Corinthians 1:4-6He [God] comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. For the more we suffer for Christ, the more God will shower us with his comfort through Christ. Even when we are weighed down with troubles, it is for your comfort and salvation! For when we ourselves are comforted, we will certainly comfort you. Then you can patiently endure the same things we suffer.

Our grief can give us the ability to better comfort others. Grief is a teacher that helps us learn compassion for others who are grieving.