How should I discipline my children?
Proverbs 13:24Those who spare the rod of discipline hate their children. Those who love their children care enough to discipline them.
Our motive for discipline needs to be love. Discipline is about relationships, not rules. It is about safety, not retaliation. Our goal should not be revenge, but restoration; not to taunt, but to teach and redeem trust.
Proverbs 19:18Discipline your children while there is hope. Otherwise you will ruin their lives.
We must discipline our children when they need it—before it is too late. Proper discipline puts our children back on the right path. If someone wanders off the path, it is much easier to find it again if they are just a few feet from it. But if they have gone far off the path, it’s very difficult to find the way back. They are in danger of being hopelessly lost.
Ephesians 6:4Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.
We must never discipline in anger. It is difficult to make a good decision when consumed by anger. In that case, our emotions drive our thoughts and actions. Discipline given in anger is too often spiteful and harsh, leading to shame rather than restoration.
Colossians 3:21Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged.
We are to discipline without causing aggravation and discouragement. Discipline will bring conflict and your kids will probably get mad at you. But aggravation is caused by constant nagging that undermines your child’s sense of worth instead of focusing on the immediate problem at hand.
Hebrews 12:10Our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God’s discipline is always good for us, so that we might share in his holiness.
We must discipline with godly wisdom, Every parent will make some mistakes when disciplining their children. Since God’s discipline is always best, we need to constantly seek his wisdom. Remember, God’s wisdom comes from his Word, but it also comes from godly people who have been in his Word and practiced discipline.
