What does the Bible say about a believer marrying an unbeliever? - Alliances - TouchPoints

Deuteronomy 7:3-4You must not intermarry with them [unbelievers]. Do not let your daughters and sons marry their sons and daughters, for they will lead your children away from me to worship other gods. Then the anger of the Lord will burn against you, and he will quickly destroy you.

1 Corinthians 7:39A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord.

2 Corinthians 6:14-16Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever? And what union can there be between God’s temple and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God said: “I will live in them and walk among them. I will be their God, and they will be my people.”

No relationship can be more important than our relationship with God. Though God gives us great freedom to choose who we marry, he commands us not to marry unbelievers. A well-yoked pair of oxen can pull far more than any one animal alone. But unequally yoked oxen may pull at different speeds or in different directions, slowing down progress and wearing down and injuring the oxen. In the same way, an unbelieving spouse is likely to slow down our progress in following Christ, or worse, pull us away from him entirely.

Genesis 2:18, 24Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” . . . This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.

Daniel 2:43“This mixture of iron and clay also shows that these kingdoms will try to strengthen themselves by forming alliances with each other through intermarriage. But they will not hold together, just as iron and clay do not mix.”

God’s design for marriage among believers is more than a partnership; marriage is a spiritual union. As a man and women learn to live fully committed to each other, they can encourage one another to live fully committed to God.

Exodus 23:33If you serve their gods, you will be caught in the trap of idolatry.

1 Kings 11:4, 8In Solomon’s old age, they turned his heart to worship other gods instead of being completely faithful to the Lord his God, as his father, David, had been . . . Solomon built such shrines for all his foreign wives to use for burning incense and sacrificing to their gods.

Judges 14:3His father and mother objected. “Isn’t there even one woman in our tribe or among all the Israelites you could marry?” they asked. “Why must you go to the pagan Philistines to find a wife?” But Samson told his father, “Get her for me! She looks good to me.”

Proverbs 12:4A worthy wife is a crown for her husband, but a disgraceful woman is like cancer in his bones.

Proverbs 31:10, 30Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies. . . . Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.

A spouse can either lead a person away from or toward God. Marrying an unbeliever not only invites ongoing temptation and distraction, but it also deprives us of the deep, lasting spiritual benefits of a godly marriage. Marrying an unbeliever is settling for a less fulfilling marriage from the start.

1 Corinthians 7:12-16Now, I will speak to the rest of you, though I do not have a direct command from the Lord. If a fellow believer has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to continue living with him, he must not leave her. And if a believing woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to continue living with her, she must not leave him. For the believing wife brings holiness to her marriage, and the believing husband brings holiness to his marriage. Otherwise, your children would not be holy, but now they are holy. (But if the husband or wife who isn’t a believer insists on leaving, let them go. In such cases the believing husband or wife is no longer bound to the other, for God has called you to live in peace.) Don’t you wives realize that your husbands might be saved because of you? And don’t you husbands realize that your wives might be saved because of you?

1 Peter 3:1-2, 7In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives. . . . In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.

While Scripture is clear that it is unwise to initiate a marriage with an unbeliever, often one spouse will come to Christ or recommit to Christ while the other remains an unbeliever. In such situations, Paul encourages believers to witness to their unbelieving spouses through faithfulness, love, and respect. This may not bear fruit in every instance—Paul acknowledges that the unbeliever may initiate a divorce. Still, faithful love and prayer for a spouse has the potential for a great reward—the salvation of the loved one’s soul.