Improving Your High-maintenance Relationships - The One Year Love Talk Devotional for Couples
Improving Your High-Maintenance Relationships
The godly will flourish like palm trees and grow strong like the cedars of Lebanon.
Psalm 92:12
About 40 years ago, William Schutz was requested by the US Navy to construct an assessment that would help them assemble compatible submarine crews, groups of men who could live together, elbow to elbow, for extended periods of time with minimum conflict among themselves. Schutz found, not surprisingly, that compatible behavior was determined primarily by “natural fit.” In other words, people who get along well with each other do so without much effort. Their relationship doesn’t require much work; in fact, you could say it is low maintenance.
Hopefully, the two of you have a low-maintenance relationship. Sure, if you’re like most couples, you have your trying times, but you are together because you enjoy a natural fit with your personalities. You may hit temporary turbulence together, but you know it’s periodic, and your relationship stays on course.
If you are like most people, however, you also have some relationships that aren’t so easy. These are the people who beef, bite, and bellyache. They give you the cold shoulder, spread rumors, seethe jealousy, play the victim, or trample your feelings. To sum it up, these people comprise your high-maintenance relationships. Well, you may wonder, are you simply left to wallow in the misery they create? Hardly.
After combing libraries, listening to clients, and surveying dozens of people, we have concluded that it is possible to make most high-maintenance relationships much better—especially when the two people help each other in the process.
Scripture not only says, “Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18), but it also promises that when we work at turning from our self-centered ways to building up our relationships, we “flourish like palm trees.” The effort you exert to improve a difficult relationship is almost always rewarded with new vitality and personal strength. Other dividends include fewer worries, a clearer mind, a more positive outlook, a stronger sense of efficacy, and better physical health. The bottom line is that improving your difficult relationships makes your life easier.
Take a quick inventory of any difficult relationships you are dealing with, and let your spouse know if there is any way he or she can offer encouragement or support.a
Irritation in the heart of a believer is always an invitation to the devil to stand by.
—Eleanor Doan
a 45
The One Year Love Talk Devotional for Couples
By Dr. Les Parrott and Dr. Leslie Parrott
Tyndale
$7.99
